Triumph over Valentine’s day.

14 Feb

First day off,
back in the bay area….
I head to this arty bar and I’m waiting for my friend to get there…waiting for this DJ to play.

My friend is running about an hour late so I spend time outside texting as for some reason, the cell doesn’t work so great inside.

So the door man says, “Waiting for someone?”
and I say I’m waiting for my friend…

I told him how I had just been there last week talking shop with one of the owners for showcasing my artwork and he was like “oh yea I remember you!”

He tells me that he just few in from Southern California for this meeting with his other job…making for a crazy long day.

I said I had just come from MY other job out of town so I had a long long drive as well.
He asked me what I did and I was like “ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I work in Nevada” and it was of course evident what I do, (no explanation needed!) because he works with some Hell’s Angels and they visit girls from time to time.

Somehow we get into this conversation about stripping, about hooking.
I tell him that the guy that I am….seeing? Not seeing? In Limbo with? Obviously isn’t taking the whole working in a brothel thing very well.

When I traveled a couple weeks ago for my art gallery meetings,
everything went great….but then noticeably, things stopped.

He asked how old the guy was.
I told him (He’s in his mid 30s)
And the crusty biker doorman says, “oh, he’s a young guy.”
He talks about how young guys get jealous.
They want what they want.

They want that piece of ass to be theirs, and only theirs!

He has to stamp some hands and in between checking ID’s, he whispers this advice as he does the possessive ass grab/slapping thing to indicate the possessiveness of younger men. It’s funny.

When you’re older (like he is)…he says…“you’re not as particular, you just want to enjoy somebody’s company.”

I told him how I was writing this book and the guy I’m seeing was saying, “get the book finished, then focus on your art!”

So here I am doing what he said – but the relationship side is not doing so great. And by that I mean…uncertain as to whether we’ll spend valentine’s day together. Uncertain in general.

He said he dated a girl who worked in a titty bar once and she was writing a book because she was trying to get stripping all unionized. She fell to the wayside for a bit but actually did finish the book. Point being is that it can be done and doesn’t have to ruin your life forever.

He has a teenage daughter and his friends have asked him what he would do if his daughter wanted to strip for a living.

He said, “I’d tell her the positives and negatives…and I’d probably try to manage her money for her an allowance and when she’s 30, then she’d be all set.”

He then told me that he knew of a girl who’s father DID do that and by the time this girl was 30, her father had purchased 3 apartment complexes for her with the money she made as a stripper.

Impressive, no?
The crusty biker man had a real calming aura about him.
He told me about how he recently had to file for bankruptcy on all these properties he owned. That when the economy went south people couldn’t pay their rent.
You wouldn’t know by looking at him but he’s a financially wise man.

He told me….
“Things go the way they go. Things happen for a reason…and even if it’s the worst thing on the planet happening to you…we all get where we need to go, and you have to let people be how they are, and be who they wanna be…”

But most importantly, he said,
“You have to do what’s best for you.”
And if what’s best for me means working a job for a while that not everyone will agree with, but I can still do my art, he says….

“If it makes you happy, that’s okay”

He said,
“Obviously if you meet somebody, and you two fall in love…and you wanted kids and a family and all that…if you loved somebody enough you’d get a different job, but all that stuff takes time.”

Strange to see this biker teddy bear man check to see if i agreed.
To see if i would find a different job.
I gave him the “YES I WOULD” face.

Then I told him, “that’s what I said to the guy…that I’m working on it, but it takes a little while to get the finances in order.”

In conclusion he says,

“I can tell after talking to you, by the way you talk that you’re a good person. There’s a real person in there and you’ve got your head set right. Do what you need to do,and things will work out like they’re supposed to.”


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