Read all about the lovely Juniper…

7 Mar

Juniper and I became facebook friends and we were chatting…so I said, hey, howsabout an interview, since she’s such an impeccable speller. If you are a close follower of my blog you might see here mentioned here under another name. She’s one of those good natured gals that its impossible to have anything bad to say about. We talk in funny accents when we’re at work to make the days more entertaining. Last visit I imagined some slightly stupid man coming in with a speech impediment so I came up with this silly drawl and would say, “Juniper, I like you a lot. I wanna party wif you.” to envoke laughter during our slow nights. Shit you not, a guy with a similar voice to the accent I made up actually came in a couple hours later. Sadly she was asleep and missed it.

So here I give you, Juniper!

What was the “pivotal moment” that led you to working at the ranch, did you research?

Well, I had graduated from college, and I played the job hunt game for nearly a year when I began to rethink my previous life choices. I was lying on my bed one day, surrounded by all my art supplies and going over the technicalities of resume construction when I randomly began to doubt that the jobs I was applying for were going to be years of torturous desk jockeying with the potential for nervous break down. I wanted to do something with my art, but the last person I met who stopped working to pursue their creative vision was later to end up living in his parents basement. So just as this thought came into my head, so too did the realization that I had not been laid in a while. I think it was an “ah-ha” moment where I decided I could try to get laid and paid. So I did the research, tried to weigh my options, poured over wikipedia articles and some brothel board sites and then the ranch websites themselves, I even read up on the history of prostitution. I think it all worked out in the end.

What made you choose Kit Kat Ranch?
It was one of three finalists. I knew I wanted to be in northern Nevada, just because I was more familiar with the area, and when I spoke to the owner on the phone I found her to be so informative and nice my search stopped right there, so I took the job.

A lot of your friends know what you do for a living – how has that changed your social life back home? Same group of friends or different?

I have some of the best friends in the world. When I informed them of my desire to try this out for a while, they supported me from day one. Sure there were a couple of people who had a small morality mind melt, but in the end I think I found out who my true friends were, and it turned out to be the ones I’d had the longest. Sure, it makes the social scene a little more interesting; usually hanging out involves me recounting the good, the bad and the ugly stories to them. It’s definitely making me into a well rehearsed storyteller.

What made you pick the name Juniper?
My full name Juniper Lee comes from a short story I wrote in college. I created this character Juniper as an alter ego to myself so that I could write semi-autobiographical stories without feeling like I was just tooting my own horn and using my real name. Plus I’ve always been a little bit of a tree-hugger, and Juniper means evergreen, and it goes with the whole green theme I got going on.

You’ve been rocking this green hair for a while now. What made you pick it and stick with it?

About a month before I even made the decision to do this I was bored. Being bored and unemployed was just the right recipe for a hair dyeing session, I was in a store, saw the dye and went for it. My hair was teal and I’ve always loved that dark green color…I’ve always worn greens and blues, so it just fit. I know people think it’s a bit strange. Men usually have a hair color preference so maybe it’s just part of my fantasy that I hope somewhere a man is saying, “Yeah, this one time I got the shit fucked out of me by a sexy green haired girl.” I think it just fits my personality.

Do you want to go back to another hair color? If you had infinite cash flow, what kind of crazy hair would you do?
I don’t think it’s going to change anytime soon, I had red hair for about a minute during the holidays because you know what they say about redheads, they’re feisty in bed, but I think green hair promotes my smooth moving nature. If I had infinite cash I would just probably want to make this color as bright and brilliant as possible. I’ve had other crazy colors before, this one has my heart though.

You acquired a super awesome cat named Louis. Tell the readers about him.

Louis, if he could speak would tell you that he is the king of the brothel. He thinks he’s the best thing since sliced bread, if he even knew what sliced bread was. Louis is my little sweetheart, even though I’ve got to say he’s a little bit of a freak. He has a foot fetish and often wakes me up by licking and nibbling my toes. He’s not the biggest weirdo I’ve encountered, but maybe just the most consistent.

Do you think Louis is a brothel kitteh? Does he get along well with the resident chihuahua?

Louis is a brothel kitteh, his attitude speaks volumes, and he’s not afraid to speak up when I’m entertaining company. He’s got his pals, and the resident chihuahua is most likely his right hand man, you can often find them playing a rousing game of hide and seek in the hall.

Lets talk about assholes. Can you tell me about the most dickwad of a douchebag who has graced the ranch? Did ya fuck him, did you tell him off, how did things go down?

Assholes cum and assholes go…I did have one guy I wanted to smack upside the face once, we were going to party, we didn’t even get to the good part before he seemed to get annoyed without reason. The party hadn’t even started yet when he told me I was terrible at my job and would never be successful at it. I was stunned. I had a moment of self doubt, and then I kicked him out of my room. If you can’t appreciate a beautiful woman trying to give you a good time then there’s no point in coming to a brothel.

Howsabout a weirdo? Any strange requests? Feel free to quote the strangest thing anybody has said to you.
I think I’m becoming a weirdo magnet, I’ve been getting a lot of strange requests in recent months, but none as odd to me as my “nipple twister.” He likes me to invoke my special ability of sucking on my own nipples, which is not too tough for my size breasts. If they were a cup size bigger, I could suffocate myself if I tried doing a naked head stand. (Thank god no one’s made that request yet.) Yet, my nipple twister comes and likes to watch me bite my own nipples. All the while he watches and says one thing over and over: “Oh Juniper, this is a pleasure, thank you!” At least he’s grateful.

I like to think that you have to have a good imagination to tough out working in a brothel. During those slow moments, what kind of things do you imagine? Do you have a happy place you visit, or some kind of future fantasy life you dream up?
My happy place is a beach. I often imagine myself on a beautiful beach, but like all workaholics this beach is usually occupied by many men, and the happy place usually turns into an orgy at some point. You can just say that I cook up some good ideas while I’m taking my mini mental vacations. If I’m not on my beach I often think about myself in a foreign country, sitting on a bench or in a cafe people watching, I think this is my way of visualizing my future desire to travel.

Readers want to know, are you saving for anything? School loans perhaps, or something bigger?
Oh, most my savings do go to school loans. College, especially art school wasn’t cheap, but if anything…it makes me feel good to pay for all that knowledge I absorbed. I do have a small portion that goes to my after retirement travel fund, where I plan on back packing through countries I’ve always wanted to visit.

Some people think that working in a brothel is more of a get rich quick scheme. I view it as more of a “put life on pause” type scenario where you can go make money til you figure out what you want to do next. Where in this equation does it fall…i.e. what kind of personal significance does it have for you?

It started out as a way to pay my loan bills, and as something I wanted to experience. I get bored with conventional lifestyles easily, and I’m always striving to lead a varied life with as many experiences as I can. I just want to get the most out of living and having this experience is important to me. It does mean you put life on pause, but I’m learning things here that will last a lifetime, so I think it will all pay off in the grander scheme of things. This isn’t the last unconventional thing I want to do. I still have to run away with the circus, and then become a nun…(okay well maybe the nun part is more of a joke but my inner lion tamer is rearing to come out. )

Have you put yourself on a plan, i.e. “I will be out of this industry by X date” or…playing it by ear?
When I got into this I decided I had to keep a tight schedule, while I’m in it, I’m here full time, but I’m 24 now and I plan on being out by 27. I think it’s important to keep a date so I don’t get lost and forget that I have other plans and bigger fish to fry.

We all know you can spell like a mofo….I’d put you in the arty quirky category….but how would you categorize yourself? Like…what kind of guys are your type, “IRL”?

I think I’ve been known to bum it around within the arty quirky category for many years. Personally I think of myself as a quiet, kooky girl-next-door who just so happens to sling paint in the general direction of a canvas once in a while. I’m quite eclectic in my nature and because of that, I often don’t have a general type of man that I am attracted to. I think the biggest things is that he has to make me smile and laugh, and it’s up to him on how he accomplishes it. I truly believe that a good laugh is just as satisfying as an orgasm.

The boobehs! They are real! Yes? So you are totally down for guys that like real boobies, right?

Yes my tits are 100% Grade A Certified real, and double D’s too. I love men who appreciate the goods, plus they’re fun to play with, and I never forgot the first thing I learned in school…share.

What are your hours – the shift you work?
I work seven days a week, from 10am-10pm, but I’m always available on request after hours, plus I work mad overtime usually.

If people want to come visit you, do you have an email where they can reach you?

I have a blog that I maintain about my experience here. The best way to get a hold of me is to either comment on my blog…, or I have an email that’s attached to it, juniperlee69(at)


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